10 things I wish I could tell my teenage self!

I might only be 23 but I have learnt a lot since leaving school. I'm not naive enough to believe that I have learnt everything there is to know. In fact, I'm 100% certain that in ten years time there will be a bunch of things that I wish I had known throughout my twenties.


Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't change anything about my life; there have been some pretty bad times and also some amazing times. Each and every experience has made me who I am and I wouldn't go back and change any of it. However, there are some things that, if I had known them, would have made life a little bit easier as a teenage girl. Some of them are serious and some of them not so serious...but I'm sure that teenage girls now could still take something from them.

1. Honesty is always the best policy  (especially with your parents)- I am generally a very honest person, I am terrible at telling lies and you can always rely on me to tell you the truth when giving advice. However, I haven't always been this honest. I was never a massive liar but told a few little white lies in my teenage years so that I could do things that I thought my parents probably wouldn't approve of. The truth is, I never stopped to find out what my parents actually thought, I just assumed that they wouldn't approve. I wish I had known that being honest with your parents about what you are doing, where you are going and how you feel will actually earn respect and build trust. Being honest with your parents, no matter how hard it might seem, will build a better relationship. 

2. You will not marry Gareth Gates - This is example is obviously specific to me but should also be taken in the more generic sense: your celebrity crush is not going to fall in love with you. No matter how many wild scenarios you can create in daydream land, in reality he is probably a fair few years older than you and hanging out in expensive, exclusive bars with beautiful (if not completely fake) celebrity women. The chances of you meeting are slim...and the chances of you getting married are even slimmer. My crush on Gareth Gates obviously didn't affect my life in any great way, it didn't have any negative impact or turn into a strange obsession but I would still like to be able to save myself wasting time collecting pictures and listening to slightly dodgey albums.

NB: I am completely over this crush now.....just in case that needed clearing up!

3.Love your small boobs - As a teenager my incredibly small boobs were a massive embarrassment. I was extremely insecure about the fact that I couldn't even fill a AA bra and hated going on holiday because it meant I had to wear a swimsuit....no padding allowed! I felt like the whole world looked at me and thought 'look how small her boobs are' We grow up expecting men to love big boobs and it made me feel like I would never have a boyfriend because even if a boy thought that I was pretty he would laugh at my small chest. Now I know that this is completely ridiculous!!!! Not only are there men out there who love small boobs but who gives a shit? This is the attitude that all people should have towards their 'imperfections' although I know that sometimes it is easier said than done. It would be lying to say that I have grown to love my boobs but over the years I have accepted them. And I know that if somebody truly loves me, the size of my chest is irrelevant. Somebody will love you for you. If a physical feature affects this 'love' then you are better off alone!

4. The 'popular' kids are the ones that end up on Jeremy Kyle - don't waste your school years trying to be like the 'popular' kids because your life is a million times better. From my school years the majority of 'popular' girls were pregnant almost immediately after leaving school and more than one of the 'popular' crowd have also spent time in prison. So in the future when you have a steady job and a family, you will be glad that you wasn't the most popular girl in school.
They might look like they've got loads of friends and everybody likes them but actually they are completely fickle and will ditch their 'best friend' for somebody 'better' without a second thought. You might only have a handful of friends, but my friends from school are still my friends now, and they are the best friends in the world, I can rely on them for anything. It is better to have a small circle of very close friends that a large number of acquaintances who won't be there or won't care when you call them at 3 in the morning with a problem.

5. DO decide what kind of job you want in the future - Whilst on the subject of schools, a piece of advice would be to try and gain as much work experience as necessary. Teachers will always tell you that without good grades you won't get a good job and in some respects this is true. However, you could have straight A* throughout your education and a first class degree, but without any work experience you will struggle to get the job you want. Our current economy means that there is tough competition for jobs so good grades in irrelevant subjects, isn't going to be the deciding factor between you and a candidate with lots of experience but all C's in their GCSE's. People skills and knowledge of the work place goes a long way.

6. DON'T pick your spots - This is a lesson that I've learnt the hard way. (And to be honest still haven't learnt). Even though I am covered in scars, all over my chest and shoulders from spots, I still pick. I wish I could tell myself how horrible it is to live with it and to try and cover them up on a daily basis!!!!!

7. Beauty can be natural - Most teenage girls don't have a ton of spare money for decent makeup and skin treatments. Some will have understanding parents who are prepared to spend the money on beauty products...others will suffice with cheap brands that aren't properly colour matched and will end up looking horrendous. Layering on foundation does not cover up spots and most of the time less is more.

8. Love your brothers and sisters - As a teenager I hated my siblings. My older brother was 'geeky' my younger sister always stole my things and my little brother was too young to connect with. We fought all the time and have never been the kind of family to do things together or share secrets. It is only in the last couple of years that we have started to connect, but its harder and a lot more awkward at times. I know that deep down we all wish that we had made the effort when we were a bit younger.

9. Take up a sport or activity that you can continue in later life - Any sort of hobby is good but a fitness related one is better. When I was younger I stayed slim no matter what I ate and had no need for exercise (which was lucky considering I am allergic to any form exercise). But as I am getting older my weight has begun to fluctuate a lot and I am affected by what I eat. I wish I had taken up some kind of fitness related hobby that I could continue into adult life because not only would I be keeping fit but it would give me the motivation to try other fitness related hobbies rather than sitting on my growing backside, eating chocolate and blogging!

10. Always be confident and believe yourself - Anybody who knows me now would find it almost impossible to imagine a time when I wasn't confident, loud and abrupt. However, I haven't always believed in my own abilities and was, dare I say, shy. It was only when I left school and started college that my confidence began to grow but it wasn't until I left home at 17, got a job and was forced to deal with the sometimes harsh realities of life that my confidence really surged and I realised the importance of believing in yourself. Acting confident (even when you really don't feel it) and having some faith in yourself will really get you far in life!


................I'm sure lots of people might find it odd that I have neglected to warn my teenage self about the affects of drinking, smoking and under age sex but, as boring as this might make me sound...I didn't really do any of those things as a teenager. I have never even tried a cigarette and I only ever drank occasionally and in moderation. As for under age sex - I wasn't under age when I lost my virginity and my views and opinions on sex were far more conservative than they are now....................so maybe I could still learn a thing or two from my teenage self!